appreciating the process

A piano teacher, knowing that his students would have a hard time understanding the necessity of practicing tedious scales and drills on the piano over and over again, was known to tell his students that it was important for them to "appreciate the process" if they were going to become a good piano player.  I think this sums up well what I've been trying to say in regards to embracing the darkness. The process of entering into and living in the light of God and His truth begins by recognizing the darkness for what it is.  Did you know that in the Hebrew worldview the 24 hour period that we call a "day" begins at sundown, at night, not in the morning?  In Genesis 1, at the end of each day of creation, it says "And there was evening, and there was morning."  The darkness was the starting point. To finish well we must start well. In the dark.

How did Saul of Tarsus begin his conversion experience?  In the dark.  In order for God to get him to see, he first had to strike him blind. Up until then he probably thought of himself as a pretty righteous guy, someone who had a clear grasp on God's truth.  Over the course of  his training and preparation for ministry he experienced many apocalypses - revelations - which one would think would have made him feel like he was filled with light, like he had finally "arrived".  But when you examine Paul's writings you discover something that's hard to believe.  Early in his writings he describes himself as equal to the other apostles.  Later, he calls himself the least of the apostles.  And in one of his last letters he refers to himself as "the chief of sinners"!  The genius of Paul was that he didn't allow his supernatural gifts and revelations to feed his pride, but rather used the light he was given to actually highlight the darkness that was still in him.  He never shied away from it but embraced it because it was a continual reminder to him that God's power is made perfect in his weakness (2 Cor. 12:9).

So, let's not fear the darkness.  Rather, we should beware of false lights that give us a false sense of security rather than increasing our dependency and connection to the Lord ("the simplicity that is in Christ" KJV, 1 Cor. 11:3c).  Note the contrast in this passage from Isaiah between those who "walk in the dark" and those who "walk in the light of your fires":
               "Let him who walks in the dark,
                   who has no light,
                 trust in the name of the LORD
                    and rely on his God.
                 But now, all you who light fires
                     and provide yourselves with flaming torches;
                 go, walk in the light of your fires
                     and of the torches you have set ablaze.
                 This is what you shall receive from my hand:
                     You will lie down in  torment."
                                                                      - Isaiah 50:10,11

Embrace the present torments of life, for they can save you from much worse ones in the future.