B.C. II (Bees Cops cont'd)

It is scary to think that one's heart can become hard so easily, without you hardly being aware of it, yet that is absolutely the truth. It's so easy to see it in others but so hard to see it in oneself . What's even scarier is recognizing that it can feel good to be in that hardened state, and because it feels good we assume it must be right. Let me illustrate.

My wife and I had had another one of those arguments where each is so convinced that their perspective is right and that the other just needs to get over their stubborness and admit they're wrong. It started over disagreeing on how much we should charge for our "free range, organic eggs" and then it spread to my commenting that she married the wrong person if that's how she wanted to live. By the time the salesman's call came on the phone she was in no mood to answer my question on whether we should buy more septic tank product (we definitely needed more product to clean our tanks, but not of the physical kind . . .). Fast forward to 24 hours later. A whole day went by and I knew things weren't good between us. But I was getting tired of having to admit, again, that I was wrong in any way. It's her turn to do some admitting. I'm just going to let her stew in her juices. If that's what she wants, she can have it. I'm still right anyway, I don't really have anything to confess. Most importantly I was feeling pretty good about it all. I didn't have any sense of guilt or wrong-doing. So the phone rings after we've gone to bed (we're lying there, giving each other the silent treatment) and I get up and answer it. It turned out to be an individual I needed to do some "hard talking to" - telling them something I knew they needed to hear but which wouldn't be easy for me to tell it or for them to hear it. Well, after that conversation was over, I crawl into bed next to my still silent partner and I'm thinking, "You hypocrite!" I had been feeling so smug about being right that I had lost my awareness to how hard-hearted I was becoming. Swallowing my pride, I initiated what fortunately became a healing conversation, and my relationship with my wife was fully restored.

Here are the pertinent observations/lessons learned from what had transpired:

HOW EASILY MY HEART CAN BECOME HARDENED WITH MY HARDLY EVEN BEING AWARE OF IT!

HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO NIP THAT HARDNESS IN THE BUD AS SOON AS IT IS RECOGNIZED!

Grace WILL come to help us overcome (that phone call after we went to bed) if we will recognize it and respond to it appropriately.

There is a scripture that speaks of "break(ing) up the fallow ground", which means to loosen up the soil of our hearts so that we can receive the seed of God's voice/word. Hard ground is a proud heart that doesn't need help and has lost the ability to hear His voice. Cultivated soil is the humility that says, "Help! I feel broken, plowed to pieces - please sow within me the word of life and water me so that Your seed can sprout, grow and bear good fruit!"

Bees, cops, price of eggs, a phone call in the night. Isn't it wonderful all the different ways that God will speak to us?! May He help us to break up the fallow ground of our hearts so that those words will not be lost to the birds or to weeds, but will instead find good soil to grow and fully mature in.